Tomorrow I leave to go to my parents' house. I am leaving three of my four girls with her and counting on a village to take care of them for the next month. I will leave on Thursday to come back and pack and I won't see my children again till we come home with Newbie in mid-September. This is the first time I have ever left town without my kids, and I am leaving the country. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale...
I am leaving my flock to find the long lost one. It is SO HARD. May May turns 5 and goes to her first day of kindergarten (on the same day!) and I won't be here. I have NEVER missed a birthday or a first day of school!! I am so so sad about this. Did I forget to exhale? .... Exhale. Inhale....
The next few weeks are going to be a circus for my flock. They will be in KS for 2 weeks and back home for 2 weeks with my husband, then another 2 weeks with my husband's mom at our house, and another week at home with my mom. They will be starting school, and having orthodontist appointments, and living without me for 5 whole weeks. (Hopefully less)
I am hyperventilating just thinking about this.
May May asked me tonight what she was supposed to do if she got scared at night without me here. GASP! I am wondering who is going to tickle her feet softly as she falls asleep? Who is going to squeeze Autie? Who is going to laugh with Tate? I know everyone who is caring for them loves them. But they don't love them the way I love them! I know them like no one else knows them.
I wish I could afford airfare for everyone! I would just take them with me!!
It makes me feel somewhat better knowing that their daddy is coming home between the referral appointment and the court appointment to care for them, to see them off to their first day of school. I dislike that I will be away for so so long, though. It was just more cost effective for him to come back alone than for us to buy TWO tickets twice. Raimie has to stay with me, since she still nurses. I didn't think such a stressful time for the whole family would be a good time to cut her off cold turkey or try to provoke her to weaning. (We are of the "child-led weaning" persuasion.)
I am so glad I will have one of my girlies with me to keep me company.
Please keep my family in your prayers over then next several weeks. This is a new adventure for all of us. But we all know it's worth it in the end.
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